Three years ago my husband and I uprooted our family and completely started our life over.
We decided to escape the rat race.
AND IT WAS THE BEST DECISION WE COULD HAVE EVER MADE FOR OUR FAMILY.
And It’s something you can totally do too.
Let me tell you how we did it, so you can too.
BEFORE We Decided to Escape the Rat Race
WE ORIGINALLY HAD NO INTENTION OF LIVING A NON-TRADITIONAL LIFE.
My husband and I did all the things “we were supposed to do”.
We both:
- attended college
- got good grades
- declared “good” majors
- started white collared careers
- were prepared to “earn our stripes” 🦓
After college we were ready for our chance at the “the American Dream.”
We’d done everything right.
Except something was very wrong.
- We were barely making enough to pay our bills on two incomes,
- we had student loan debt from our college degrees,
- we were stressed as hell
- and purchasing a home of our own seemed like a literal joke.
We quickly learned that 9-5 was a joke as it was closer to 9-6:30…maybe 9-7:30 if you had a commute…oh, did you actually want to spend time with your kids?
We felt suffocated by society’s expectations.
How could we raise well-balanced kids when our work responsibilities overwhelmed us, the education system was letting us down, and we could barely save $100 at the end of each month to put in our savings account?
WE FELT LIKE LITERAL HAMSTERS ON A WHEEL.
And so we became determined to find a better way to live our lives. We wanted to figure out how to quit the rat race.
WHILE We Were Deciding to Escape the Rat Race
WE STARTED DREAMING OF ALTERNATIVE LIFESTYLES.
🚙Maybe we buy an RV and travel the country?
🏠Maybe we build a tiny house on a piece of land?
🌽Maybe we become farmers and move to a cheaper state?
(and this is where you start to brainstorm your alternative lifestyle because it’s your key to freedom)
But it was my husband who eventually suggested the winning idea.
“Let’s Move Abroad”
After the initial shock wore off, my brain started making plans. 🧠
IF WE LIVED IN ANOTHER COUNTRY WE COULD:
- Reduce our cost of living dramatically
- Afford private education for our daughters
- Raise bilingual children
- Detach ourselves from the overspending culture of the US
- Belong to the cultural of a country who prioritizes family over financial wealth
But it wouldn’t be easy. We had a lot of hurdles to get over to make it all work.
HOW We Decided to Escape the Rat Race
So we made a decision. We’re leaving the US. And our country of choice?
MEXICO🌵
But how were we going to uproot our family of 4?
How would we get established in a completely new society?
ENTER: Finding Role Models ✨
I CANNOT STRESS THIS ENOUGH: when you decide to do something that feels extremely difficult – maybe even impossible – the very best thing to do for your brain is to find someone who has already done it.
So that’s what I did.
- I listened to every podcast,
- watched every YouTube video,
- and read every book I could find on moving abroad.
Every chance I got I’d fill my head with “proof” of the possibility of our dream.
IF SOMEONE ELSE DID IT, WE COULD TOO. 💪🏼
Little by little our plan solidified until the only thing left to do was take action and make it happen.
By the way, I am working on creating a course for anyone dreaming of a life abroad. If you’re interested, sign up for more information below! ✈️💗
AFTER We Decided to Escape the Rat Race
About 2 years after we decided to restart our life on our own terms, we made the jump.
We packed up our cars and we drove them down to our new home in Mexico.
✨THE ENERGY SHIFT WAS INSTANT. ✨
- People moved slower,
- strangers weren’t rushing,
- and life felt…simpler.
Over the next few months our nervous system adjusted to the slower pace of living.
We taught our kids to swim, 🏊🏼 we took yoga classes, 🧘🏼♀️we started baking bread 🥐 and making crafts with our daughters. 🎨
Life became about more than just advancing our careers and buying the latest toys.
For the first time in our adult lives, we felt like we could breathe and actually enjoy ourselves. And our kids were thriving for it.
HOW YOU Can Escape the Rat Race Too
There are many many many many ways to escape the rat race. The first step is realizing the truth of this statement.
There are endless alternative lifestyles away from the hustle culture of the 2020s.
As soon as you choose an alternative lifestyle from those around you, you quickly learn how many people there are living interesting and unusual lives.
You absolutely can escape the rat race. It just takes convincing your brain it’s possible and taking action.
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SO HERE ARE MY TOP 5 TIPS for ESCAPING THE RAT RACE
1. Allow Yourself to DREAM BIG
YOU CAN DO ANYTHING WITH YOUR OWN WILD, BEAUTIFUL LIFE.
There are endless possibilities and the sky is the limit. Actually, you could even go to space – so not even the sky is the limit anymore. 🚀
Dream big. AS BIG AS YOU CAN.
The bigger the better. The more excited you get the better.
2. Find People Who Have Already Done What You Want to Do
Look to Youtube, Podcasts, Books, Social Media…even this very blog.
Look for people who are already living interesting, slow, enjoyable lives like the one you want.
You may not find a creator living your exact dream, but get as close as you can.
Fill your brain with proof that your dream is possible. 🧠 Because it IS.
3. Take Baby Steps Towards Your New Dream Life
If your dream life requires a new skill, work a little bit on it each day.
- Learn a new foreign word every day.
- Play your instrument a little each day.
- Take a few photographs each day.
- Memorize a plant name each day
- Study the map each day
- Learn about RV repair each day
Make time to take micro actions that align with your dream life every single day.
Even for 1 minute per day.
4. Prepare for Negative Feedback from People In Your Life
This one…sucks. Especially for people pleasers (guilty 🖐🏼).
Fair warning: when you give yourself permission to escape the rat race and create a life that you love, you are going to trigger people.
People might feel that creating the life of your dreams is irresponsible or immature.
People will think it’s unfair that they’re “trapped” and your goal is to be free.
Let them think what they want. Their opinions are not proof that your idea won’t work. ❌
When we decided to move to Mexico people who I hadn’t talked to for years came out of the wood work to share their opinion on how “stupid” our idea was.
THE AUDACITY WAS ASTOUNDING.
It definitely poked holes in my confidence, but luckily our vision was strong enough that we didn’t let it stop us.
Be prepared for criticism, and be careful who you share your dream with – especially in the early stages when your brain is still feeling nervous.
5. Remember that Even a Life Outside the Rat Race Isn’t Perfect
When you first escape the rat race you will feel on cloud nine.
🌯Food will taste better,
🌈Colors will seem brighter,
💪🏼and you’ll feel unstoppable
But then you’ll realize life’s annoyances still exist in your new rat race-free life.
You’ll find things you don’t like about your new life and you may be tempted to run back to your old life because at least it was familiar.
Resist the urge to throw in the towel right away!
We set the goal of living a full year in Mexico before allowing ourselves to move back to the US.
SPOILER ALERT: we still live in Mexico 3 years later.
But having a timeframe goal is hugely supportive for those first few hard days in your new life.
Here in this Community – the Candlelight Collective, We Believe You Deserve to Love Your Life
I did NOT feel a lot of support when we were blazing a new path to create our dream life.
But you don’t have to feel alone on your journey to a slower, more intentional life.
I’m building this community to convince as many people as I can that they deserve joyful, fulfilling lives.
AND I’M HERE TO SUPPORT YOU ON YOUR JOURNEY.
So if you’re ready to create your dream life and quit the rat race, sign up for our newsletter!
We talk about all things alternative living, living with the seasons, and cultivating a joyful, fulfilled life.
I AM SO EXCITED TO SEE WHAT YOU DO WITH YOUR LIFE!